Sleep is for the Weak: Real Talk
Do you ever hit that zombie sleep stage? The one where your body is so physically exhausted, but you don’t really have any time to slow down to catch up. Your blood is around 87% caffeine, and it virtually has no effect on you anymore. You’re drinking Red Bull like it’s water, and are neglecting any healthy habits and behavior. You’re probably eating Pop-Tarts and dry Lucky Charms Cereal for every meal, because you haven’t been to the grocery store in weeks. You may have grown a scraggly beard, not because you want a beard, but because you sacrifice shaving in the morning to gain an extra ten minutes of sleeping. I literally just had to plan a Chick-Fil-A Lunch date with a friend three weeks ahead of time just so we could find and hour where both of our schedules were clear and could align.
It’s usually at this point in the year that we see it. If you haven’t noticed it yet, look in the mirror, or just gander at the people you interact with on a daily basis and look for any changes. Irritability, short tempers, depletion of quality and performance. Right before Spring Break. Workplaces have quarterly reports and expectations to be met, and students are racing eagerly around like hamsters on a wheel (working really hard—but not getting very far) trying to prep for midterms, and register for Fall Courses, along with balancing a series of other responsibilities.
Normally at this point in the year, this is normally where I’m at. I’m in the same place as so many other people. Just counting down the days until I can breathe. Maybe you know what I’m talking about.
Except this year for me has been different. Nothing really about my routine has changed, but for some strange reason, I haven’t hit the imaginary yet very real wall that brings us billowing to an immediate stop. Yes, my eating habits are probably still just as bad as they were previously, and I am definitely getting less sleep than I have in the past; so this isn’t some miracle health trend that I’m trying to share with you. Besides, many of those claims are rooted in bad science anyways. What I can tell you however, is that I have learned to discern the difference between sleep and rest.
This seems a little irrational. “Come on Nick, these are the same things. When I sleep I find rest.” Although that may be true, let’s switch that rhetoric around. Question this. When you find rest, are you sleeping? That’s real talk.
In my head, there was just an action scene I imagined where I’m wearing some bangin’ sunglasses, and driving a red racecar flying off a jump through a flaming hoop with my arm out the window, as I drop a mic. While in the background you hear some sirens and a hip-hop track beat. Welcome to my brain.
This seems pretty straight forward, but why is it so difficult for us as humans to grasp?
I’m kind of an insomniac. I can go to bed really late, and get up pretty early, and still function well. Don’t get me wrong, I love to sleep in, but I don’t need it. What I do need however is to find rest.
Now you might be wondering, if I can’t find rest from sleeping, where does it actually come from. Is like a powerup in a video game? Can you just change the way you’re acting to obtain it? Does it come from Kale? No, no, and well unfortunately no.
Learning to rest is something that you have to learn to do for yourself. You can’t be given step by step directions for how to obtain it. Finding rest in your own life is very personal. It’s like a pair of underwear—it could be loosely fit like boxers, or incredibly structured like briefs. In the same sense wearing someone else’s underwear usually isn’t very comfortable. Not sure where I’m going with this.
Often times it requires being intentional about spending time alone to reflect on situations, circumstances and events before reacting. It’s in this time that you can recover and refill yourself, after pouring yourself into other people.
Some examples of when you might find rest are early in the morning with a cup of tea or coffee while sitting in your favorite chair, or out on a trail walking your dog. It could be the solitude at the gym you find only in the middle of the night. Maybe you find rest with a book in your hand or with a journal in your lap. For me, it’s when I’m drawing mindlessly with my headphones in, or on long car rides.
Again, it’s something that’s uniquely yours. If you don’t make or find time to find this rest, you’ll find yourself in a cycle of monotony, not sincerity, and everything you do from there on out will be reflected in that.
Setting the stage for this requires not a change of attitude, but a change of heart.
Seeking out rest has to be purposeful. It’s not something that you can neglect; otherwise the outcomes will be obvious to those around you. Just think, have you ever seen people who try to do yoga, who have no interest in yoga—they definitely don’t find their “zen.”
In 37.4 hours I jump (I probably won’t jump—I’ll walk) on a flight to LAX for a ten hour layover, before a second flight where I’ll spend the week in Baja, Mexico for a university class on Ecotourism in foreign countries. It’s going to be an adventure filled week (with some killer food) and I’m thrilled I took the very late and last minute opportunity after my plans to go to Texas next week fell through. I’ve been the crazy running hamster getting everything in line for next week, but I haven’t abandoned my need for true rest, and have been diligently seeking to prepare myself emotionally and spiritually for the international journey. I may be physically tired, but I will be rested for the encounter.
So as Spring Break approaches near and you can hopefully find the time to take a breath; hold fast and restart your lifestyle with an attitude and knowledge recognizing the intrinsic and far greater value of finding true rest, instead of just finding time to sleep. In doing so you’ll find yourself more content with your situations, and start noticing the hidden values and innate beauty in this crazy thing called life.
Besides, Sleep is for the Weak…
-Nick
