It's Not About Me!

If you scroll through my Facebook feed you’ll see me tagged in various pictures and posts where I am in some wild costumes, where I’m getting tackled in the snow by some middle school boys, where students are playing messy games that usually involve shaving cream, colored streamers, cheese balls, peanut butter, and the occasional frozen fish. To most people, it would seem like I need to find a better use of my time—and that’s a fair argument. Although as crazy as that may seem, to me, it’s just another average day.

I got asked the other day by a friend if I get paid to hang out with high school students every week—to which I quickly replied, “No.” He was then confused about why I would spend my time and energy hanging out with those hormonal, sticky and unappreciative monsters—better known as teenagers. At the time, I didn’t have a definitive answer, of what really drove me to volunteer with YoungLife, besides it was something that I enjoyed, but after much thought and consideration, I believe I have finally deduced, why I spend every Monday night hanging with students.

The thing about people who work with adolescent students is that they are a special breed of human. The type of people who can deal with rambunctious, yet sensitive, outspoken yet contained, and obnoxious yet intellectual individuals on their way to adulthood are the most unsung heroes of our communities. The amazing thing about youth workers is that when it seems like everyone else is running out of a teenager’s life, youth workers run in.

Coaches, teachers, mentors and friends of students can see past the surface level of teenager’s actions, and look for their intentions beneath the aura of anger and Axe body spray. These people are able to recognize that overstepping boundaries, making mistakes and challenging authority are all just all parts of growing up, and understanding the vast world in which we live. This nontraditional way of regulating emotions isn’t a problem, but rather a more practical way of managing feelings and experiences. So often so many adults want to blame teens especially for causing disruptions and for challenging norms—which I won’t deny happens (Yes the police have shown up on Monday Nights at YL.) However, I would then challenge that by saying that those same hormonal kids are the same kids who will challenge authority with distinction when in opposition to social injustices. Who will be the movers and shakers in societies across the country. Those same loud obnoxious kids will be the ones who will speak up when everyone else stays quiet when dealing with complex and abstract conflicts.

Instead of disregarding them and shoving their interests, passions and desires to the side, maybe we should acknowledge that they have their own distinct experiences, opportunities and cultures that have shaped them into the way that they are. The fact that our upbringing was different doesn’t make the way that they have grown up wrong. We should replace our negligence with open ears, minds and hearts, understanding that they have their own set of complex issues that they are trying to grow up with. Treating them with respect, even in instances when it would be so much easier to just raise your voice. Treating situations with humor, and embracing a new found sense of humbleness.

This past semester I was with sophomores at an area high school doing field experience for my education course. At the beginning of the semester one of these wannabe gangster boys, said he would break my ankles in basketball, which I told him wouldn’t be much of an accomplishment since I hadn’t played since middle school. He then said that he would battle rap me, to which I told him really wasn’t a wise choice. So as I finished my field work this week, I kept up my promise with him. Let’s just say the dorky college kid in the khaki pants and polo shut this kid out—bar none. Although impressive, it was a mute point, because what this really showed me it that kids want to feel like someone can see eye to eye with them, and walk through life with them, understanding their struggles, but at the same time can equate themselves with them and not supersede them with authority, but rather walks side by side with them—even if that meant battle rapping him in the middle of class. This fulfilling the ultimate intention of seeing them for as they are, not as they are told that they should be.

So with regards to why I hang out with and do life with students week after week, it’s boiled down to a couple reasons. For one, I believe in the future. I want to know that an investment of my time and energy now will reap greater rewards for generations beyond. I want to live a life of service, even if I never get to see the products of my actions. Though even more than that, I strive to see and understand the hidden beauty in the group of individuals that the rest of our world has chosen to abandon hope in. Because beneath the braces, terrible driving, and bad choices in hairstyles, I see purpose and potential. Purpose and potential for greatness, that just hasn’t been recognized yet.

Besides, Y the L not?

-Nick